ah, found it. using VS .NET 2003 and VAX build 1216 this isnt listed via the pull down arrow at the end of the toolbar which opens add or remove buttons. this only lists the default 8 buttons. it is available via right click and customize.
I still think this needs to be on the toolbar by default. What sense does it make to have the second most important button not be on the toolbar? It's annoying to have to add this in every build...